Saturday, November 8, 2014

Letter of Resignation

This week, instead of doing my homework for class or refining my thesis that's due next month, I worked on my novel for NaNoWriMo. Instead of further pursuing a Master's Degree that will have long-reaching and immediate benefits to my career and professional life, I worked on a novel with the goal of nothing more than writing words for the sake of writing words. Instead of reaching out to my friends or working on adventures for them to go on someday, I wrote about a character and his friends doing just that. 

What the hell was I thinking?

Well, what I was thinking about was simple: I want to do this thing because I said I would. Because I'm a habitual half-asser and I was done with saying one thing and doing another. I figured if I jump in deep, on a project I know I can do, I'll have no choice but to succeed. 

I still believe that, but what I failed to do while thinking about this was to choose my battles. If I'm going to stretch myself thin, let it be for some epic shit, not just to heal a wound in my ego. 

This is all a roundabout way of saying "I've got more important things to do with my time right now." And so, six days in, I'm officially saying "screw this" to NaNoWriMo this year. I wish the best of luck to my friends who continue to fight the good fight. Maybe I'll even try again next year, if I'm not, you know, pursuing a graduate degree while working full time, writing freelance reviews for a great website, working on any of the projects I already wrote about a few days ago in my blog post about The Kitchen, or trying to reconcile my marriage with my wife. 

Are these all excuses? Maybe. Do I give a shit? Nope. 

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